Hey everybody! It’s Fred the flea.

I love this time of year. Humans are so confused that it really makes my job of surviving the winter much easier!

Because let’s talk about winter. Up north, it’s starting to get nasty outside. In the words of Dean Martin: Baby, it’s cold outside. I love those old classics! And as long as my family continues to propagate, we’ve got amazing historical references. Movie lines and song lyrics are my favorites.

But cold is in the eye of the beholder. What’s consisted cold in north is not the same as cold in the south. I love these people in Florida. Hear them tell it, it’s cold when it’s 50°F at night. You should see them bundle up in their sweaters. They even put sweaters on their dogs.

Talk about an ideal situation!

I love dogs and cats wearing sweaters when it’s 50°F at night. Because that means it’s in the 70s and 80s during the day. And it’s humid. Not all dry like in Arizona. I find a perfect nest under the base of the tail. Literally, “snug as a bug in a rug.” You could say “snug as a bug in a tail.”

What’s cool (get it? Cool?!) is these Floridians think that the weather has “cooled off” so they think they don’t need to be on the lookout for me and my flea family. Bam! Winter survival here we come!

You see, cold is all relative. For that matter, hot is relative too! As it hot as it gets down south, my family and I really struggle to survive when temperatures are over 100°F. We prefer northern latitudes in summer times. But when temperatures get back down into the 70s, when the humans think that things have “cooled off,” I am talking ideal survival situation!

So in those “cold“ winter months, my mantra to the humans is “move along, nothing to see here.” (What’s great movie! Bet you didn’t know that George Lucas had a dog named Indiana who was the inspiration for Chewbacca. Chewbacca had fleas. So did Indiana. Survival baby it’s all about survival.)

If they’re not expecting my family to survive winter in Florida, ‘cuz even snowbirds have fleas, then it just makes my life that much easier! Maybe it would be more accurate to say even fleas can be snowbirds. Doesn’t matter. It’s all about survival and tricking the unsuspecting human.

Mwahahaha

Flea Power!!

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